Been There, Dunn That

Today–if you’re an American–is Thanksgiving day. Our last chance to relax and be thankful for all the many blessings God has bestowed upon us… before we all become hateful, vicious slaves to capitalism over the next month–starting with “Black Friday.” Is it not ironic how angry and rude people behave for the sake of giving to others?

“Excuse me while I shove you into this endcap, beat in your skull with my purse, and run you down with my shopping cart so I can buy some lousy, fourteen dollar George Foreman Lean, Mean, Fat-Reducing Grilling Machine for my brother.”

You think I’m exaggerating? Maybe a little bit, but not by much. What about the woman who was trampled and knocked unconcious for some crappy, $29 DVD player at Wal-Mart last year? Ridiculous. Whether I end up shopping tomorrow morning or not, I’m determined not to act like a total jerk. It’s just stuff, people.

However, for those of you that must inflict harm on others, be sure to use round, blunt objects. We don’t want any bleeding. Elbows work fairly well… especially in the ribs.

Anyway, this whole ’share-what-you’re-thankful-for’ thing is worn-out. Therefore, allow me to present… “Stuff I’m NOT Thankful For.”

U2: Who’s idea was this, really? There’s only one good thing that came out of Ireland, and that distinction goes to Irish Spring–the only soap meant to be sliced with a giant hunting knife! Seriously guys, go back to peeling your precious potatoes.

The Atlanta Braves: Why on earth does Ted Turner keep wasting his money on this group of idiots? A herd of llamas with bats duct-taped to their heads could play a better game of baseball.

Eggnog: This stuff was obviously conceived before the days of marketing. If you’ve never heard of eggnog before, the name of this stuff isn’t gonna make you want to try it. Am I wrong? Same goes for cole slaw.

UK Basketball: Do I really have to explain? It hasn’t been the same since they lost Rick Pitino. Now it’s horrible, instead of just plain bad.

Oprah: I’ll be thankful for her when she gives me $1,500 worth of free stuff.

Okay, seriously, I’m not really this cynical. I’m just having a little fun. I really am thankful for things–lots of things. Too many to name individually, in fact. I am very thankful for my family, friends, and roommates. Some of you may fall into more than one of those categories, and if you’re reading this, there’s a good chance that I am thankful for you; unless, of course, that dirty Bono found my website somehow. Hehe. Cheat Commandos…ROCK ROCK ON!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

At home church last night we discussed Luke 6:27-35. As we read the passage I got a horrible, sick feeling in my stomach. Here’s the passage I’m referring to…

“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also; and whoever takes away your coat, do not withhold your shirt from him either. Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back. Treat others the same way you want them to treat you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men.”

Am I the only one affected by that passage in this way? I don’t do that. It seems so impossible; but would Jesus tell us to do something if it couldn’t be done? I really wish I was like that. It really is easier to love people who love you back… but God expects more out of His children. Like Jesus said, even sinners do that. I want to get to a point where I can read that passage and not feel guilty… but I don’t know if anyone can ever get to that point.

I haven’t posted in a while. What am I to say? I’ve always avoided using this website as a place to just talk about what I did during the day. I mean, really, who wants to read about my boring day? Heck, I don’t even want to talk about it… that’s how boring it is. That isn’t to say that my life is meaningless, but I rarely have anything happen to me where I am immediately compelled to tell everyone I know about it. I reserve this space for stuff I actually believe is worthwhile to share… and that’s why you may not see an update for days or weeks at a time. Sometimes I just don’t feel like I have anything interesting to express.